Who Will Survive … in America?

The Winners and Losers of COVID-19

Not a list, but a list…

The Winners

• Scientists — Youz guys will be sought after for your expertise in all areas for at minimum the next four consecutive years. Now we need your research and dedication. So boom grant money from everywhere. Then we will need you for vaccination trials and administering. Then we will employ you all for recording findings and tracing subjects. Then for history sake to document all that happened and work on future prevention. You will be used and paid handsomely.
• Grocers — They will win regardless of farmers and big industry because they are the final man in the grand scheme of distribution. In-house brands and prepared foods along side of service and convenience will always be needed beyond this pandemic. People will honor and cherish the ability to shop for basic necessities and praise the grocers that covet their relationships with their customers. The buck will stop here and just keep coming no matter how bad things get.
• Beauty and Wellness Brands (Not to be confused with Cosmetic only brands) — If you sell soap you will survive this pandemic. If you have full product lines that house sanitizers, candles, face masques etc along with soap you are winning right now. And if said products are organic, fair-trade, sustainable and or holistic you are sitting on a gold mine. All people can do right now is wash their fucking hands and do useless self-care. They will spend their last dime on these products and if you can back them up with claims of saving the environment or clearing up skin issues the better. These things do not need a lot of introduction, instruction or flair just a few descriptors and decent packaging and people will order this stuff until the world ends.
• Supply Chain Managers — One would assume this role was not only new to most corporations but dispensable. Now this will never be the case. They will pay someone in the same realm as a lawyer or risk manager to maintain supply levels and monitor trends in regards to their industries. It is inevitable and similar to companies making extreme investments in other areas like Social Media, Diversity and Human Resources.
• Cam Girls — The sex worker is a professional that has to adapt quickly to maintain their livelihood. They have been through war, AIDS and the digital age and this is a storm they can muster. While porn can be limited to social interaction, distribution and access … Cam-ing is easy. The only problem is those girls need breaks and if everyone is home for an extended duration especially those still making an income the requests can be non-stop. This could be a very bad thing but for now in my best Martha voice this is good.
• Bloggers/Vloggers (not to be confused with Influencers) — Digital media is where it is at right now and content can always be monitized and syndicated. Blogs can be opinionated and uploaded without restrictions. They can also be bought to be represented in like minded spaces for better reach and following. People aren’t getting their news or tangible advice from typical sources and they aren’t be influenced by bought thought. Blogs are the only way to make sure what you want and need comes from a genuine source.
• Life Coaches — As much as I cannot stand these types they will become vital. They will support emotionally strapped people as long as this goes on and they will guide them as they return to their normal lives. Normally, a life coach is sought after a traumatic experience or used temporarily through a tough time like a weight loss journey, grief from a loss or a bad divorce. People are going to use a life couch now to give them purpose when their lives as they knew them are permanently interrupted. If a life coach is good at their trade and can tie into other streams like metaphysical elements or fitness they will strike gold on long term relationships that will pay them handsomely all the way through complete transitions.
• Insurance Companies — People are inundating their insurance companies with business interruption claims. These claims will probably never see the light of day. Right now people are so unaware about their current policies or what rights they have in regards to acts of God, business interruption and employer compensation they will seek broader terms. In other words, the market for insurance will bubble as all sorts of people look to add silly conditions to their existing plans to either safeguard them now or prevent them from issues in the future. They will not require being sold as they will run to agencies for more coverage. And most of these types will pay for decades on end as something like this may never happen again … at least in their lifetime or for the remainder of their businesses existence.

The Losers

• Insurance Companies — I want to believe that a good amount of commercial liability claims will bankrupt the industry. First there will be business interruption claims. Then those businesses that do remain open will have employees seeking workers compensation for a multitude of reasons. Finally, after inevitable anarchy there will be so many claims for vandalism, damages and loss. And aside from that all the people will just cancel policies because they lost their housing and or vehicles. I mean so many auto insurers have given money back to those with policies because no one is driving which is sort of a blessing and a curse. Ugh and all the health and life insurance claims.
• DIY Concepts — I feel so bad for these types of businesses that popped up in the last ten years. All these power bowl and shake situations. All the fro-yo spots where you put in your own toppings. All the stupid places like sip and stitch, drink and paint and whatever the fuck. Ugh and those weird places where people make their own jewelry or soap. These concepts are so unsanitary and they are horrible business models. You can clean and disinfect as much as you want but that granola is teeming with filth. People lick things unknowingly. People do not get a new glass. People do not wash their hands. They come into these places and they just dive in and there is no way they can continue with their business models post pandemic.
• Social Media Influencers — If the majority of your income is based on how many people you convince to buy useless shit you will not survive this. Surely, there are things people need and want right now but how long will they be able to make impulse purchases through such channels? Most people with limited funds will not buy from sources they cannot return to. The options influencers provide are trend and temporary. They are middle men to products and services that do not have longevity. It is one thing to boost an established brand that is already a household name and it is another to plug a no name boutique who bought 100 pieces of clothing to flip. Also people feel that it is pretty insensitive to promote these silly brands that could be scamming unsuspecting buyers. If your name is attached to hourly promo now would be the time to switch to other mediums like dance challenges and foot porn.
• Chiropractors & Massage Therapists — What a horrible time to have opened your own practice for areas of “medicine” that aren’t considered real. There is literally no way to continue working on a virtual basis during this time and people strapped for cash will cut these options out of their basic needs after the pandemic. Seriously, legitimate sources will be struggling to survive without steady patients, walk-in facilities cannot operate and those that are unsavory will follow suit. Unless there is some other source of income like in house products that can be sold online there is just no way to function.
• High End Restaurants — Short order and dive institutions are winning right now. They can turn out food with little to no employees or overhead. They are already equipped for to go and delivery orders — they have containers, bags etc. Their menus can continue with minimal interruption to sources because it is processed and or frozen. High end restaurants do not have the luxury of remaining open. I mean some are trying but it is terrible for their brand image. Those that haven’t furloughed employees and closed shop are attempting to compromise vision to fulfill weird take out expectations and watching their demise is cringe worthy. I’ve seen beautiful restaurants resort to curbside pickup mixed cocktails in pho containers and making quesadillas from what is normally on the cheese cart. Other restaurants are doing DIY meals to clear out their walk-ins and the fail bus is that people that eat $300 plus meals do so for the experience and they do not cook. Their social media is tanking with complaints and questions as they do not know what to do with the $100 roast you sold them. Long standing establishments should temporarily throw the towel in just for brand integrity and hope they have the money to come back in the fall with a vengeance. Ugh and don’t even get me started on the gift certificate thing as a last ditch effort of survival … so tacky. I am not buying a gift card for a prix fixe that may not exist in the next six months. This borders on fraud. Just ask for a donation instead or better yet donate the food at least to your staff.
• Cosmetic Companies (Not to be confused with Beauty & Wellness brands) — The large conglomerates that produce drug store or luxury cosmetics will probably survive this. Their brands are still accessible either through physical shopping or online orders. The one off small batch brands that distribute through Sephora and Ulta may not see it through. Unfortunately, for many of these brands their only visibility is through actual sampling. If their target consumer cannot try their product on it will not sell. Surely, there are brands that do a lot of sales online but most people buying at the moment are refilling product they already trust. I doubt people will impulse buy new brands that they have never seen in person. So with the absence of beauty and department store retailers those smaller brands may suffer. And when these places re-open so much will have to change that there will be no buying confidence as before. I would hate to see the industry as a whole change but it is inevitable. Sorry, ladies but you cannot try before you buy and sinks in these places will be the new normal.
• Wireless and Internet Service Providers — I am sorry but you are essential right now. You will have to pay your employees as essential workers. Your bandwidth and servers will be struggling. Your data usage and their overages will probably go unpaid. People are going to use the ever loving fuck out of these services until they cannot anymore you will have an obligation to stretch that unpaid and unappreciated service with zero incentive. Sorry not sorry.
• Independent Contractors — Uber drivers. Instacart shoppers. MLM sellers. You are all low hanging fruit and it is up to you to throw in the towel. People are going to drain you all for what they believe you are worth and it will take a toll on you. If you haven’t already please for the sake of you and your families get out now.
• Doctors — Forgive me but these selfless human beings will not be getting the resources or incentives to do the work they are doing. They will be on the front lines and the ones who make decisions that will haunt them. Surely, they have the support of nurses but it is ultimately them who sink with the ship. They will get no grace on hours worked, procedures performed, patients recovered or lost. They will sacrifice their health and their families health for us.

Good Measure?

• First Responders — Those working as police, firefighters and paramedics will find themselves in similar trenches as doctors. They will have problematic exposure and make decisions that will imprint upon them for the rest of their lives. The only perk is that there is an army of them and they can balance off of each other in comparison to doctors. Surely, there is a shortage as many are ill or have lost their lives but there are more of them than doctors and nurses.
• Medical Students — Those who can suspend studies to work as demand is high are lucky in a clinical respect. They can work. This may be the one opportunity a lot of prospective graduates have to actually get their feet wet without scrutiny or sacrifice. However, they will be subjecting themselves to lax rules, exposure and a terrible teaching environment. I am certain students who have been chosen to work understand this but what an extraordinary gamble.
• Nurses — The incentives some hospital groups are providing incumbent nurses are crazy. But what about existing nurses or recent graduates who aren’t as lucky. And what luck is it to gain a bonus paycheck that you may never get to see.
• Educators and Their Students — Teachers, Instructors and Professors have always sacrificed a lot of their own personal, professional and academic needs for their students. Right now a great majority of educators have switched to virtual instruction or have been furloughed without notice. The ability to adapt has been put upon them and their students have suffered the most. I am not sure how education will bounce back after this. Students who want their education will demand it but how will the model sustain for those who don’t? This is a scary time.
• Skilled Workers — As businesses take this time to spruce up their locations and offices they will call upon the engineers, electricians, plumbers and HVAC techs to do the work. But how sustainable will these jobs and contracts be as the economy struggles? I am certain that work will be there regardless so trade workers will still be utilized but will they have to charge more for their precious work and their exposure to those who just want the work done?
• Farmers — No one is bailing these guys out while harvesters take ill, processing facilities shut down, distributors fail to buy and consumers scramble for food. It is a cycle. I commend those that can get their crop out but I weep for those who are watching it die before their very eyes.
• Travel, Ticketing and Booking Agencies — You will never give people refunds. And you will book twice as many trips, concerts and hotels as you never refund. I saved the best for last didn't I.

Pandemic Byline:

I have voluntarily stayed indoors since March 5th. I live abroad, but I am stuck at my mothers in the country and my flights were cancelled … twice. I am okay but like everyone I have cabin fever. I am financially challenged as I rely upon a husband on another continent to give me money while I expect a check from my President. Yes, a slippery slope. The reality has set in that because my retired mother and I have worked all of our lives and we reamin taxpayers but our checks will never come. All other sources of income are null and unlike most of the country we are loving this new normal. Yesterday we bought plastic outdoor chairs. Maybe sitting outside will allow us much reflection as we have exhausted all the television re-runs, board games and dried bean recipes.